Astrology Fulla Rompolicious Stoopid For A Planet Packin’ Big Time Frickin’ Crap

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Here's Whatchya Woulda Won If'n Only You'd Found Me Sooner

Scopes — Dec '18

HOROSCOPES

horoscopes with predictions for luck fame & fortune in december 2018

NEED HOT TIPS FOR GETTIN’ THE MOST OUTTA YOUR HOROSCOPE?

How This Works

Sorry, sweetie — but it is brutally simple.

Decembah 2018 is gone.

She is dust.

Feeble or strong, happy or sad — you are gone also.

Time is NOW, so don’t linger here too long.

It is the past, an’ it is over.

Get frickin’ movin’…

DECEMBAH 2018 HOROSCOPES

“Help My Feeble Ass … For Seriously I Be WAY TITSED”

Gotta figure Decembah 2018 was naaaht a cool month for fusin’ horoscopes an’ Moi.

Reason?

Sagittarius Season grabbed me by the boobies an’ swung me way outta control.

So … nuthin’ here to see.

But that ain’t too bad, is it?

Means you survived the month without my wise counsel, so what do YOU fuckin’ care?

Anyways, now you finally pitched up, why not take a look in on the current Astro Situation?

Interested In Astrology Like You Could Die? Want a Steady Squirt of Astro Action Pumpin’ From Your Twitter Roll?

Top solootion is to follow Moi on Twitter.

Srsly.

YOUR HANDY HOROSCOPE CHECKLIST

Gotta figure ifya gonna derive maxo benefit fromya horoscope you gotta imbibe its wisdom all proper.

Simply follow my super-practical 10-step Guide, an’ horoscope readin NIRVANA gonna be thine, tellya…

horoscope checklist infographic helps everyone whatever their starsign

Douse me in sunlight.

Float me in air.

Breathe on me sweetly.

What else is there?

Gowan — Squirt This Baby Around Like Fizzin' Champagne