THE STARS AS BRAS

Best thing about packin’ boobies?

Bras!

So excitingly exotic! So tantalizingly varied! So subliminally raunchy — even in the wash!

Thing is, Mother Cosmosis got plenty to say ‘bout the nipparel we throw over our zestychesty yummiture.

She stopped by my place last week to return sum panties she borrowed for Valentine’s, an’ while she was raidin’ my refrigerator for high-brainfuck alcoholic flooids, she came out with onea her trademark edicts.

“Princess,” she said, diggin’ deep between alla my salad stuffs, “you should run a blog post about the stars as bras.”

“As in bras for evry signa the Zodiac, typeathing?”

“Yeah. Everyone is getting off on that shit right now, and it’s a convenient way of introducing complex astrological truths to the masses.”

For a gal jus’ ran a quinteta monster celestial retrogrades, gotta say Mother C was lookin’ purdy good to Moi.

Kinda inspirin’.

So I took a real deep breath an’ said, “toss me a cucumber willya? Ima need plenty big time nootrients to fix this fucker!”

Anyways, that was my Wednesday.

Project engaged me so much I even skipped yoga.

Tellya, bra research is a tougher academic exercise thanya think — especially whenya keep hittin’ the BUY NOW button asya flip through a zillion open browser tabs.

But I figure I got this Stars as Bras deal nailed — how evry kinda boobie from pert & perky juicebombs to 10 ton squidos gonna max out on the Zodiac’s 12 highly individual astrological essences via the humble bra.

Uhm … no … waitaminute — what was it Mother Cosmosis said before she made off with alla my lettuce?

Oh yeah — “Keep it simple, Princess.”

So here’s how astrology gonna power upya titties…

the stars as bras reveal secrets close to Aries hearts
the stars as bras reveal secrets close to Taurus hearts
the stars as bras reveal secrets close to Gemini hearts
the stars as bras reveal secrets close to Cancer hearts
the stars as bras reveal secrets close to Leo hearts
the stars as bras reveal secrets close to Virgo hearts
the stars as bras reveal secrets close to Libra hearts
the stars as bras reveal secrets close to Scorpio hearts
the stars as bras reveal secrets close to Sagittarius hearts
the stars as bras reveal secrets close to Capricorn hearts
the stars as bras reveal secrets close to Aquarius hearts
the stars as bras reveal secrets close to Pisces hearts

Want More Fun Shit To Look At?

The Stars as Bras got the perky — but ifya want Zodiac-themed DOOM an’ DEATH, mebbe try these funky astro tombstones.

Want serious pussy?

Alla your Zodiac kitties are over on my Tumblr.

Want horoscopes?

Want motivatin’?

Hey — I am always here.

Stop by regular. Suck on my jugular. Move on dinkier….

Title Image c/o Alexas-Fotos @ Pixabay

Other deliciousness enboobulates thusly…

Aries c/o kblaw @Pixabay
Taurus c/o Foundry @Pixabay
Gemini, Leo c/o sabinemondestin @Pixabay
Cancer c/o luctheo @Pixabay
Virgo c/o fsHH @Pixabay
Libra c/o Unsplash @Pixabay
Scorpio c/o Bobine @Pixabay
Sagittarius, Aquarius c/o Klaus Hausmann @Pixabay
Capricorn c/o alejandroruelas @Pixabay
Pisces c/o bestfotoartist @Pixabay

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Summary
The Stars As Bras
Article Name
The Stars As Bras
Description
The Zodiac's premier boobie-packed brassierefest drops neat an' sweet over Tittiekind, promisin' maxo allure for perkilicious buttons an' 10-ton squidos alike! C'mon in, squishvixens!
Author
Publisher
Princess Balestra
Publisher Logo
By | 2017-05-20T11:11:17+00:00 May 8th, 2017|Brassiere Blasto, Mother Cosmosis, Motivation|0 Comments

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